I am pretty sure I have never been as good a runner as my cousin in-law, but I have always loved running. Before I had Samuel I was training for a half marathon and looked forward to running every chance I got! Then I was forced to stop because of a hip injury. After a few months' rest I thought I could start again, but could not because of my pregnancy with Samuel. I planned on getting back at it after Samuel was born (in order to shed that baby weight), but then those plans were altered when I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
About a month ago we found out about the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure 5K run in Savannah and Matt and I decided to participate in it. Matt is not and has never really been a runner (or a jogger). He is active, but has always disliked running and has never trained for any races. But he told me that he was determined to train for this race. To be honest, I doubted that he would follow through with his commitment at first. But he has been going out several nights a week to train for the race. I have been so proud of him!
Of course, after seeing him run (and checking out the Nike GPS App he has been using) I got the bug to run. I finally decided that there was no reason that I couldn’t start running and try to train for the race with him. I thought, "I can handle it. It's just 3.1 miles, right?!" Well, I apparently underestimated how hard my surgery and chemotherapy have been on my body. When I went out for my first jog I was in utter pain - especially in my chest - and realized it was just not going to happen that day. But being a bit hard-headed, I decided that the pain of that first jog was a fluke and I tried jogging again the next day. But after my second failed attempt at jogging it became very clear to me that I was not going to be able to do the 5K. I might do the mile walk, or I might simply just watch everyone else do the race.
I know I will be able to jog and maybe even run again someday. But for now I am having to learn to be content to live "in this skin in this time," as my cousin in-law put it. I have to remind myself that this is only a phase and God will strengthen my body in His perfect timing.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God
is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.